Rogers, Over & Out

Well, thankfully the pirate dance will be no more. Brandon is done, and can now go back to being a really lame singer for poppy acts who don't really want to be outsung by their backup singers anyway. Good luck, Mr. Rogers. We will miss you less and less with each passing minute.

I suppose the "thrill" factor came from Phil Stacey being in the Bottom 3, but if you noticed, only about 2.5 people booed about that announcement from Ryan, with roughly a 55-second lag time in reacting. That means no one's actually voting for Elevator Stacey, and I'm pretty sure his alien supporters are having a tough time getting calls through on touchtone phones. He did better vocally than a lot of other guys Tuesday night, but that cranium is just wreckin' the flow. And there's nothing to be done about that. Not here, and not on planet Zorn.

Of course, the evening's sweet ecstacy came when Sucky Sanj was in the bottom 2. Yay for Indian Americans losing interest in American Idol. Problem is, his A Team is likely going to work 5 times harder to get him back out of the bottom 3 come next week. All we can do is pray that his poor showing in performance and vote-getting eventually chokes him out of this show forevermore - and soon. But at least us ladies will get another hair tip before we bid adieu.

Haley obviously grabbed all the pity votes away from Sanjelica this week, so we should also hope that she continues to reek as only she can and that the judges shoot her in the belly so the country's good Samaritans can save her. Then the Indian Stink can go home, and she'll have bled to death by the following Tuesday. It's so picture perfect I almost wanna cry.

Diana Ross attempted to sing again, but only managed some overaged shouts that she's still got in her quite limited artillery. She's in shape though -- you gotta give her that. Next week we see a slightly less colorful cast go at it again, with the middle of the pack fighting it out for the best average amateur prize. And although she doesn't need it, I'm wondering why Lakisha hasn't simply put a bunch of cracks all over the stage whenever Melinda goes on. I mean, c'mon.. use The Doo's OCD to your advantage Kiki! She'll be so concerned with "equal opportunity" stepping, that she'll likely trip off-stage mid-set. (What? You got a problem with dirty play? It's dog eat dog in this biz, ya dig? That, and it'd just be really funny.)

Until Tuesday!!